How HBO’s “True Blood” Should Have Ended

BillSookieFor seven seasons, the HBO series “True Blood” – based on the Charlaine Harris Sookie Stackhouse books – deviated almost unrecognizably away from the source material. Every character not killed off managed to pair up with someone, but similar to the final Harris novel that reportedly left fans unsatisfied, HBO botched a chance to one-up the author on the final outcome of Sookie and Bill.

Here’s three suggested treatments for a better ending; this is just off the top of my head, but I prefer number three.

***SPOILERS IF YOU STILL CARE!***

  1. Sookie and Bill die together in the graveyard: Unable to watch Bill’s suffering, Sookie offers herself to feed him before he dies, a willingly sacrificing to provide one last comfort before he pops; it ends with friends and family attending Sookie’s funeral revealing a headstone next to Bill’s family.
  2. Sookie begs Bill to make her into a vampire: Finally admitting to herself she would stay with him forever, Bill finally accepts Sarah’s cure before turning Sookie and burying themselves together. Sookie’s blood enables them both to survive the daylight and join in the Thanksgiving celebration: the premiere vampire couple of Bon Temps.
  3. Sookie makes Bill human again with a little help from Grampa: After hearing Bill’s thoughts, she suspects the faerie-mixed Hep-V cocktail she infected him with is turning him mortal but not fast enough to prevent his true death as a vampire. Sacrificing the last of her power and hoping it’s enough, faerie grandfather Niall secretly lends a hand to restore Bill to life. With Sookie no longer a faerie and Bill no longer a vampire, they live happily as mortals raising the family they always wanted and growing old together.

Pick one…they’re all better than what crawled out of the writer’s room.

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Conservation of Mass: Shouldn’t Shifters Make More Sense?

HumanFlySeveral paranormal and supernatural series have “shifters” now, humans that can turn into other creatures, animals or otherwise. Unlike weres – werewolves, werecats and werecoyotes that can only shift into one form and often are affected by moon phases – shifters can take on multiple forms.

My question, however is this: conservation of mass. To make this example simple, the modern Avengers Hulk (“Son, you gotta condition”) doesn’t make sense whereas the old Bill Bixby and Lou Ferrigno tv “Hulk” did. Why? Because you can imagine something getting a little bigger, but where does the mass of something ten times larger come from? How is all that energy stored, and where does it go when it isn’t in use?

Both “True Blood” and the Twilight movies make use of shifters. In Twilight, the wolves appear four times larger than their human counterparts. In “True Blood,” Sam can shift into a fly! Where does 160 pounds (wringing wet) disappear to unless that’s going to be a HUGE fly? Just as incredible is Sam’s ability to find jeans that fit him perfectly every time he shifts back to human form no matter where he is, but I digress.

So, does it strain credibility when a character shifts shape into a creature too large or too small to be believable? Yes, its magic or mysticism or whatever, but does it help suspend disbelief when the shifting is done into something of approximately the same size and perhaps relative shape?