Penske Walks, GM Folds, Saturn Dies

My last two cars were Saturns, including the one I have now. It’s a 1998 SC-2 sports coupe with the loaded package: aluminum wheels, leather steering wheel, dual overhead cams. It doesn’t look like an eleven-year old car, thanks to state-of-the-art body panels that kept it looking great even after being hit and/or whacked on every side of the vehicle.

The last time I was at the dealer (following a friend and fellow Saturn owner for maintenance), the few remaining sales zombies shambled toward me hopefully. Sadly, the current fleet had nothing to offer me; my car’s paid off, looks and runs good, and gets close if not identical mileage to anything Saturn has. Plus, the new fleet lacked features that used to make Saturn stand out, such as the impact resistant body panels they stopped making five years ago.

With my own interior upgrades, there’s really nothing new they could offer, and the sales zombies shambled away. Soon they’ll be standing with the rest of the living dead at the unemployment office when not chasing down a job lead, and that’s just not how I ever thought Saturn, “a different kind of car company,” would go out.

On second thought, plastering a logo on a Pontiac Solstice and calling it the sportiest thing you have to offer wasn’t the smartest idea, either. Face it, GM… you treated Saturn and its customer base like red-headed step children and they all would have been better off without you. There! I feel better now.

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